In the days immediately following "the exorcism" I began to see and feel
the world in a whole new way. It seemed
as if I’d always felt slightly apart from everything else… not now.
I couldn’t remember a time when I hadn’t had angry,
resentful, violent scenarios running through my head. It seemed there was
always a constant chatter going on. One that was never positive. As I walked our
dog the following morning I was shocked that I heard nothing but the sound of
the world around me. Instead of forcing myself to see what was in front of me I
saw it all very clearly (I compare it to those Claritin commercials. It was if a waxy film had been removed from my world. I saw colors and heard sounds like never before.) In the past I’d had to count or repeat the Lord’s
prayer in order to silence the negativity.
Now, I simply stopped and heard the ambient sounds of leaves blowing,
birds chirping, cars driving past. It was like waking up in someone else’s
body. I was stupefied and cautiously joyful.
Maybe it had been real.
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